Last Birthday's Hat

I started a thing where I buy myself a really nice hat on my birthday. So far I have three really nice hats (and seven regular ones, plus a couple ugly ones from 10th grade...)

 

Folks, wearing a really nice hat and carrying a banjo makes you seem older. (Ahh, a story for another time!)

Not this hat though. Fake porkpies (it hasn't got an indent in the crown! Tut tut, Goorin!) move people to call you a hipster (wearing plaid and old man pants plus this hat to a conceptual writing class, yep. Talking about Martha Stewart and making croquembouche during said class, double yep. Hipster.)